The following is an excerpt from a teaching by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo called “Your Treasure is Heart”
As westerners, we want to make Bodhichitta about feeling: “Feelings, nothing more than feelings…” You know that song? I wish they’d never written it, because somehow it’s gotten into our consciousness as Americans. We’re singing this tune and believing it, hook, line and sinker.
Here’s a magic golden key: Once we realize that giving rise to the Bodhicitta is not about a feeling,we can be more tolerant with ourselves, more comfortable on the path. We can still consider ourselves practitioners of the Bodhichitta if we’re in a bad mood. Do Bodhisattvas ever get PMS? Yes, they do. I can tell you that for a fact. Do Bodhisattvas ever wake up feeling like they got off on the wrong side of the bed and they are not going to be happy? And they are determined not to be happy? Yes, they do. Do Bodhisattvas ever get sick to death of everything? Yes, they do. Do Bodhisattvas ever wish that everybody in samsara were o.k. and they could just ride off into the sunset and do exactly what they want? Oh Lordy, yes they do! Bodhisattvas feel all of those ways, but they have that practice, that knowledge and that determination.
Once you let go of the idea that compassion is about a certain feeling or appearance or some ridiculous verbiage about love and light, then maybe you can be comfortable on your path. Maybe you can still be a Bodhisattva when you have PMS—because you don’t get time off for that I’m afraid to tell you. Sentient beings are still suffering, whether you have PMS or not. So you become a mature practitioner. Human frailties are human frailties and we all have them. We’re walking around in human bodies with arms and legs and we feel the way we feel. But what has that got to do with the needs of sentient beings? Our determination, therefore, through really studying and practicing in this way (link to yesterday’s teaching), should remain firm and strong.
I have my really bad moments. Yet I have to say that every time I have a bad moment when I just don’t feel like it, I learn to respect and understand the condition of sentient beings. If you didn’t have those feelings once in a while, you wouldn’t even know what you were up against, would you? It’s almost like that’s part of who you are. So be comfortable with that and don’t let it influence how you engage on the path. If anything, let it make you even more determined. It’s o.k. to be exactly who you are and be a Bodhisattva.
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