We Can Do It!

December 30, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo:

It is called neurotic obsession if for even one day one cannot cease rolling something around in the mind or gossiping/talking about it endlessly. It simply is not normal behavior. It defies reason that grown human beings would feel so impotent and empty that they obsess about a strong person.

If I were afflicted with an obsession like that I would most certainly turn the lens of judgment on myself. As a Buddhist we are taught to examine our own minds critically and with honesty. And that to constantly harp on and on putting down others is fundamentally unsound.

To follow someone by watching everything they do and then judge every single move is madness! And to gossip endlessly like hags over a fence is ridiculous to watch. To watch the hagglers turn around and boast at the depth of their practice is just stunning. It seems like insanity!

If their Practice were that deep they simply would not be afflicted with such profound obsession. At first I thought, as I studied this phenomenon, I felt it was based on hatred, and I still feel it is a factor. As time passes, I can feel it is much more complicated than that, and that the judgment and gossip is a sign that their lives are empty of other more normal qualities and abilities. I fear they are lonely, frightened, emotionally arrested people, quite pitiful. They seem to be powerless in their minds and in their lives. I feel the fixation is a way to deal with the sadness and fear, to fill up the great big hole they feel. So it starts as hate, then devolves to fixation, then one sees the neurotic obsession clearly. Is it obsessive/compulsive disorder? I don’t know, not a psychiatrist. And one would have to see their lives and speak with them for the whole story.

However, even a lay person can see that level of sickness and it is frightening. A person that fixated can be dangerous to their victim. There are no healthy judgment calls. They can ruin a person’s life for their own sick reasons. And if not treated can become violent and abusive. Obsessed people may indeed be capable of murder and other heinous crimes if not treated. They seek to be powerful by trying to dominate and control. They want their victim to feel pain and suffering and are prepared to deliver it to them. Most murders of women are by men they know and who fixate on them. So one can see how serious this issue is.

There is no quick or instant fix. Extensive therapy and medications are needed. And prayer and compassion as the afflicted are in pain. Obsession is an indication that there is a poverty of spirit, visible in their lives. And the fear they are too impotent to manage getting ahead. They see their victim as someone who has what they should have, an attitude of entitlement. They fear they cannot measure up. They fear the accomplishment and success of the victim as it shows up their own failures. They constantly compare themselves and their lives with the victim, and find themselves lacking.

It is ridiculous to compare oneself with others. Some will be greater, some will be lesser. It is on the relative level, but that is the level on which this game is played. What good does gossip, jealousy and hate do anyone? What part does this have with Buddhism? None whatsoever. If one wants to do nothing but gossip all day every day, fine by me. But please do not drag Dharma through the mud. Do your old hag gossip thing if you must but stop hurting others. This is wrong Dharma. No excuse for this hurtful behavior. Get the psychiatric help needed. Don’t be afraid to face your own demons, not others. You have work to do. For instance, try some Bodhicitta.

As for the victims, take yourself out of the picture. Turn your back and walk away. Pray for the tormentor, but from a great distance. Understand that this violation of your mind and spirit is not your doing. You do not deserve it. It is a sickness and it is not yours. See the obsessed from a psychological distance that you yourself build. See the sickness is not your burden to carry. The only way you can be hurt is if you buy into sickness as a world view – if you accept the harm done. If you have right view and intention, you can remain proud and strong. You are not the criminal here. So I say again walk away and never look back. You are greater than your tormentors. Heal yourself, build an inner wall to keep the harm out and walk on. You must have something special to be an “object”. Rock on! Do your thing. Savor your strength. Love yourself. See your life as a banquet. Sit down and feast. Let the violators eat the crumbs from your plate. They do not have plates of their own, and that is why they want to take you down. Don’t let them. This is your feast. Enjoy!

But pray for those looking for crumbs under your table. They are tragic lives, have compassion. And kick butt in your life. No one can do it for you and nobody can do it like you can. Stand strong in DHARMA! Only you can be you. ONLY YOU!

Cut the Spell

December 30, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

Lyrics by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

Well we can try to see through all the madness

We can try to know what must be done

We can try to move unbound with habits

We can try to see the changes come

See the way without confusion

Sound the tone of pure display

Start the song of sweet compassion

Feel the love this very day

Why when it’s so like a circle

Must we go ‘round?

Why when it’s so filled with suffering

Must we go down?

And here are the Jewels, so precious

That we have found, yeah

And why in this time of auspiciousness

Should we be bound?

We can cut the spell

That heavy, heavy dream-like spell

Clear our minds with living light

That will take us through this night

Try to make it through this endless, long, dark night

Well, we will cut the spell of this commotion

We will break away from ego’s weight

And we will open up with pure devotion

And we will pass on through the Buddha’s gate

Clean it up with strength and power

Pass on through, don’t hesitate

Here it is, the final hour

I have come to liberate

And why when our hearts fill with longing

Do we still cry?

Waiting for the nectar and nourishment

We keep our pride

Holding our anger and jealousy

These things we hide

Sweet sound of freedom within us

Unveil our eyes

We can cut the spell

That heavy, heavy dream-like spell

Clear our minds with living light

That will take us through this night

Try to make it through this endless, long, dark night

The Swiftest Path

December 29, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo:

Mind as Guru happens after one practices well with Guru Yoga according to Vajrayana Buddhism. Guru yoga is the most powerful method of all. We are taught it is the fastest method to realization of all. The Guru Yoga is practiced at every level. It is a large part of Ngundro, and real accomplishment of Dzog Chen depends on it. In these times of degeneration it is without exception the best way. One mixes mind with that of the Guru like milk mixed with water until they are inseparable. Not the personality, that is just relativity, not important, but the accomplishment, the lineage of pure transmission, the true face of a Nirmanakaya appearance; Buddhahood.

Without this peerless training and practice there is little hope in these dark times of worthless opinions and pride. To rely on one’s own limited mind without first practicing Guru Yoga is useless as the mind has not been ripened. An unripe mind is deeply opinionated and ego-centric. Hard like rock and worthless, in that it has no capacity to perceive with any depth. All is mental acrobatics and superficiality. Therefore one sounds, even trying (from the ego, natch) to sound deep it is just spiritual bologna. The meat is mixed with crud from the floor and stuff one cannot spell or name. To think the mind is Guru before it is deepened and ripened is dead wrong.

We consider our Tulkus to be Nirmanakaya Buddhas, therefore not “of”, or trapped in samsara. Like entering a room full of smokers, the Tulku may smell like a smoker, but the taint is gossamer thin. The actual smoker has the poison throughout their winds, channels and fluids. So we look to these Nirmanakaya forms as that which did not arise from samsara. They are an extraordinary display of all the Buddhas and their retinues. The personality is irrelevant. It is the direct line to the realization of the Guru we look for.

Many claim enlightenment, even saying they are the Guru. But when we examine the results, their lives, their accomplishment, their capacity, their deeds we can see this is not so. You see, the seed of samsara only produces more samsara. Whereas the seed of the awakened mind arising from the primordial ground of being will result in Buddhahood.

Sadly there is no free lunch here. One has to work the path to see the result. Like exercise, it doesn’t help to think about it. One has to practice and build until real muscle is seen. That muscle, in this case, is the accomplishments of one’s life. Not just selfish concern but true benefit for all beings. Have you fed them? Clothed them? Liberated minds? Have you done anything beyond the personal realm? So we’ve raised a couple of kids, cook dinner every night, all that. Good for you, but all mammals do that. It is the extraordinary accomplishments that make the difference. Many boast about their accomplishment; I say, show me. There is plenty of wheat and chaff in samsara; can you make gold? Can you make a lasting footprint of Bodhicitta that will benefit beings in the time to come? OK, well, I guess that’s my job then. I accept!

We Are the Ones

December 8, 2011December 28, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

It seems, these days, that the world is divided up in slices, like a pie. There are those who build, create, heal, teach, add and love. Then there are those who break it down, destroy, hate, blow their egos up, hurt others, lie and bring harm. Of course, there are also those who are themselves victims, hurt, alone, afraid, undone and suffering.

This has for me been a time of truly awakening to the suffering of the world. I had always believed in the underlying good in humans. I still do, but more in the sense that all beings are themselves the seed of Buddha. In the last three years of my life I have seen more hate, more meanness, more corruption then I ever did growing up, and that was bad!

This is to me heartbreaking. Those who love and care are terribly outnumbered. Those who would beat up the whole world for fun are too many. I cannot understand hating for entertainment. Is it too much to ask for that haters leave us to our own choices? Many of us choose a path that involves morality and ethical behavior. To the hate side, that is not cool. To the caring side there is no love without ethics and morals.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama teaches the value of dialogue. I agree – to a point. When we dialogue and are only greeted with rage and rant there is nothing to work with. The two sides have very different goals. The haters love confusion, delusion, harm, chaos, destruction. The caring ones want a good result; plenty for all, loving kindness, a bright and giving society – basically to make this world a better, more loving place by having been here. Since we cannot take anything with us but our own karma, we give it all for the sake of all beings. The ignorant do not understand – a huge funeral, crypt, whatever, to inflate ego does no good at all. It is our deeds that speak the loudest.

I have this idea, for instance, of offering my body to feed polar bears, since we have nearly destroyed them. My Lineage will likely not allow. But it is my dream to have my body fed to a mother sow and her cubs. It may save their lives. Who cares if the ego is treasured? It is nothing, and healing hunger is something. I had a dream that I would be allowed to do that. I was so happy to do it.

Who are you, then? A caring one? A hating one? A victim? A BEAR??? This is one lonely planet we must all share, like that pie. What is your goal? What do you hope to accomplish?

My profound wish is to nurture and benefit this world and all sentient beings. I want to die on my feet trying. I want to hold the world in my arms. May I feed the hungry, clothe the poor, save the animals from suffering, and teach the young and the lost. And when I die, may I bring life again by offering my body. Can you understand that? Why waste anything when there is so much NEED? Why play ego games when there is so much at stake? Give it all. You have nothing to lose. Make a difference. Be a mensch. Grow up and love like everything depended on you. Because it DOES.

Indeed, we are the ones we have been waiting for, as our President says. There is no one else. Be kind while you can. It has always been up to you, to us – all. Choose. Then walk your talk.

OM MANI PEDME HUNG!

Advice for the Path

December 8, 2011December 28, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

HH Penor Rinpoche & HH Karma Kuchen Rinpoche

The very best way to announce that you are an ordinary deluded sentient being is to claim yourself to be Enlightened.

The best way to announce you are needy with an ego to match is to insist that you are enlightened.

The very best way to let everyone know you are truly a fool is to shout out everywhere that you are enlightened.

The very best way to warn everyone you are an egomaniac and dangerous is to claim enlightenment and that you can “give” it to others.

The #1 way to announce your ignorance of spiritual matters is to be hateful and vengeful.

The very best way to let everyone know you are not acquainted with compassion is to gossip and slander.

The best way to express good qualities and show your stuff is to shut your pie-hole and benefit beings. Make the world better.

The best way to live a decent wholesome life is to get off your butt and actually do it!

The best way to offer spiritual leadership is to walk your talk and know it isn’t about you.

The best way to bring beings to the Path is to practice it, accomplish it, be it in every area of your life.

If you meet someone who proclaims himself to be accomplished and enlightened, the best thing to do is let him be.

If you meet a teacher who makes no claim for themselves, but allows others to speak; and their life and works are sublime- call them Guru!

If that teacher promises hard work, change, method, empowerment, a lineage of purity to depend on- follow to the ends of the earth!

If you are on the path and are practicing daily and well under the guidance of a qualified Guru, please rejoice! Be happy! Each day new and better causes and conditions will appear to enhance your progress.

If you walk the Path of Dharma guided by a pure Guru you have already attained the nectar of this human rebirth.

Cultivating Awareness

December 8, 2011December 26, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of Tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo:

Did you know that there is a fundamental difference between Vajrayana Buddhism and other faiths? All faiths improve our life, our minds and hearts, and give us structure and aspiration, hope. Buddhism has all that in common. The difference is that Vajrayana Buddhism does not recognize self-nature to be inherently real. In relative view we perceive self as solid through the five senses which also are empty, yet are themselves perceived as real and solid. The entire reason we compile our lives as seemingly solid is that once we fall prey to the concept of duality – self and other – both of which are dream-like, we simply cannot see the great expanse of truth.

Conceiving self and other as real sets us up to react to what is perceived as outside this supposed “self.” We always react with hope, fear, or indifference. Like I hope you will love me. I fear you will abandon me. I hope there is food and money. And fear it will not be enough. I hope you will not harm me – I fear you will. Indifference is involved when both views have been applied and neither does. I hope there is something coming from you but I see nothing will – therefore I am indifferent to you. In fact most people and things that do not excite our hope or fear usually are not even on our radar. Our five gross senses are meant to recognize what seems to be “other” and to measure and assess that. So you see – this whole perceptual event occurs instantly, before we even realize it has. So our entire awareness is based on that, meant to perform in a certain way. That is the only means to sense at that level.

In meditation we close out the gross senses and give rise to those awarenesses which are far more subtle and intuitive – quite gossamer, in fact. Much more spacious and formless themselves, this subtle awareness is what is needed to fully recognize the primordial ground of being, and the spacious empty luminosity that is our true face, the same taste as Buddhahood.

One must meditate to dispel the illusions of separateness and solidity. And we enhance the more subtle (and true) view that is the essence of true discernment and the precious awakening called enlightenment. It takes time! As we begin to awaken we develop compassion as we are not separate and no different on the relative level as all sentient beings struggle to be happy, while being unaware of their true nature.

I am asked- if we are empty of self nature, then who gave birth? Had that heart attack? Who says “ouch” when pinched? And what is it that reincarnates?

In Buddhism we see no self. What happens is rebirth. Buddha said we are cycling through death and re-birth and suffering because of desire. So true! Not a separate entity, but the thread of desire and other habitual tendencies rise up as our mindstream and continue on. We, then, with the five (made for this) senses believing in separation consciousness then measure, contrive and support it. Then once again we believe that we and all phenomena are all entirely solid and real. It is sort of real in that we react. Ouch! Yet not real in that there is no pinch no pincher, no pinchee, no hand, no no-hand, no pain, no no-pain, no self, no sorrow and no one to gain from self cherishing. And all of this is dream-like and without substance; no here, no there, no hate, no love, no one to hate or love. Yet our nature is love itself, BODHICITTA!

Can You Change?

December 8, 2011December 23, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo (@jalpalyul), December 23, 2010

Tonight I am asking for prayers for my little Boston Terrier “Truman Bean” who had to go for emergency surgery tonight. He had a bubble on his eye which was being treated with various medicines. This afternoon the bubble opened into a horrible ulcer. Don’t know if he’ll keep his eye or not. He was in terrible pain, is in VA hospital now with eye surgeon. My sweet Baby! Please pray for him. Man, this is getting brutal! Another surgery, this will probably cost $6,000.00 that I don’t currently have. Here we go again, my little feller Truman Bean in great pain, facing surgery tonight. I have to sell something, or raise money. At least the hospital took him, and is kind.

Please pray for my Boston Terrier, serious eye surgery, pain, I rely on your prayers. He is such a love. I had thought to talk about Guru Yoga tonight. Hard to do when my Bean is having surgery. I pray he will keep his eye, and that he is free of pain. When I am in pain I call to the Guru for relief. Animals cannot do that. We must do the Prayers for them. They do not have that great capacity, although they have, frequently, excellent qualities. I wish it were true of all of us.

If a puppy is loved and trained from birth it will be loyal and loving. Even if rescued, they can change and transform for the better. It is actually harder for humans. We have so much pride and conceptual proliferation we find it difficult to change. Dogs live in the moment. No pride, no resistance to change. The dog looks to us, without fear, for guidance. If we break that commitment the dog and the human both lose. We must be a rock of support for our animals. They cannot understand many things and rely on us to guide them through a human world. We domesticated the dog. Now we owe them our support and loving kindness. Dogs can no longer care for themselves, have lost their doggie skills. Whenever I go out I try to bring something home they will recognize as a “kill” so that they can understand where the “alpha” has been. Dog packs have the “chip” to understand that the alpha must hunt for the pack. This way they can feel the alpha caring for her pack. Sometimes it is Dingo bones, or other yummies. But once they settle down to enjoy, the event is over. Alpha Mama is home and all is well. OM MANI PEDME HUNG!

May I speak about Guru Yoga now? Here in the west devotion is completely misunderstood. Buddhists feel they can be Buddhas the moment they decide to – like changing shoes. In Vajrayana the fastest most complete and most efficient method is Guru Yoga. Not intellectual prowess. You cannot think, plan or proclaim Enlightenment and make it real. We rely on the realization of our Gurus because they have crossed the ocean of cyclic existence many times before and are appropriate guides. The Guru is considered the door to Liberation, as if the house was afire and the Guru was the only door. This is why the Tulku system is necessary in Vajrayana. If we follow a fake Guru with poor qualities and little realization there can only be poor result. The seed becomes the tree and bears fruit. What is the fruit of an ordinary mind? Just ordinary, not leading us out of Samsara, but deeply entangled in it. A realized Vajra Master is them self free of the gross attachments, and faults we all need help with. Left to our own human resources it is hopeless. Big egos become king babies. Lotsa blow, no show, no glow, nothing to rely on.

Often when we fail at Guru Yoga, devotion, we think we are finished with the path. We start to teach one another, like a fourth grade child teaching a third grade child. No particular benefit. They are both grade school children, maybe more interested in collecting chewing gum under their seats, or pulling little girl’s pony tails. A mature, grounded, selfless, compassionate Guru is needed so we don’t spend our short lives acting out like bad children going every which way- acting, re-acting and most importantly, never learning how to die!

In Buddhism we gather virtue and merit for this and all future lives. The hope is to die and be reborn consciously and flawlessly. This is our way! To live and pass without fear, whining, and in such a way as to be reborn intentionally for the sake of benefiting beings! This is the benefit and great wondrous beauty of our path. May all sincerely enter to completion! Learn to see your own capacity in the face of the Guru! Not the personality, or clothing, or appearance or activity of the Guru, but the awakening, the true face which is the fundamental ground of being. The true Guru, then, is one’s own inseparable nature understood deeply and profoundly, not just intellectually and with many words and pointless concepts. Do not follow what is incapable. Follow what is perfectly endowed and fly!

© Jetsunma Ahkön Lhamo

How Will You Live Your Life?

December 22, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo (@jalpalyul), December 22, 2010

I am always so disappointed when I see a long time practitioner who toots his own version of accomplishment when clearly there is none, or puts him/her self up on a throne that they do not belong on. It is not the ego that is recognized and enthroned, it is Wisdom and compassion that are meant to be properly enthroned; and it is to benefit the Dharma and the people. Not to puff up bloated egos. That happens naturally in samsara. One practices to pacify the ego, not to enhance it. If you must waste time and merit pumping it up then you are lost, utterly lost and must turn right around and go back to preliminary stage and purify. Of course if the ego is too bloated that will not happen.

Many would rather take it to their grave than work the path truly. That is not Dharma, that’s false pride. False pride is a mind and heart killer. One cannot think clearly about one’s path or history, can only stroke and fondle that sick ego. It hurts when other people do not agree, and must get into 1) self pity and whining, or 2) aggression to put the disagreed person down. Or make them look bad, even if it requires lying, hating, violence, et al. – whatever it takes to avoid any and all responsibility for one’s character. That is the coward’s way. It shows weakness, not intellectual strength.

Truth and virtue are arranged like a platter of cookies. Pick some! The red sugar cookie? The green? Take what you like and go home and gobble them down. Have you been to a feast? No, you have been to a party where you and only you are the entertainment and the joke! Those of us who practice Dharma deeply and with great respect and love can spot you in a New York minute. And grieve. Those that practice to be big, tough and cool, to get adulation will never have it. Like planning a funeral party rather than finishing and accomplishing every prerequisite for death and being ready and completely unafraid. To be prepared for death is honorable and dignified. That is vajra pride! Also one should practice both the yidam and Phow’a extensively. Anything else is foolish and shows one’s ignorance and lack of accomplishment. To spend the last times bragging about qualities one does not have is a waste of perfectly good life.

Did you love? Did you give, rather than steal? Did you change for the better? Is the world better for your life? Or are you a user? Are you the wizard behind the curtain being mighty and ridiculous? Or are you a human being- loving, being loved, giving hope and healing to others? We talk, us baby boomers, as though our environment is the trouble. Not. We were born to the trouble, it is our Karma. To ignore that is to be a fool in a world cursed by and filled to the brim with fools. If you want to be stand up and real; give, love, heal, turn around and start again.

At any time, if there is five minutes left in life, love, gather virtue and care- not just your circle of family and friends that agree with you, but all sentient beings, every one. We will all die, be sick, suffer… Be a brave and pure beacon… show us how it’s done. We need that.

We do not need your scorn or your judgment! There is plenty of that from ordinary sentient beings.

© Jetsunma Ahkön Lhamo

How Does One Learn to Forgive?

November 26, 2011December 22, 2010 by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo

From a series of tweets by Jetsunma Ahkon Lhamo (@jalpalyul), December 17, 2010

How does one learn to forgive and do it with grace? It isn’t for cowards. Forgiveness is hard work. Some folks are seemingly incapable, but I think the issue is they are afraid to try. It takes character, courage and an understanding of one’s own emotions. One must dig deep within and find strength, maybe the kind you never knew you had.

First, one must examine the “condition” of the “enemy” to see why they act as they do. Perhaps there has been disappointment, jealousy, or rage in the present moment and from the past. One’s “enemy” is likely acting out their suffering. Often they project that on you, but allow yourself to let that go. One should only accept the person’s actions against oneself as justified if it is actually so.

Sometimes we blame ourselves for another’s hurtful behavior. That is not helpful, so some “inner work” must be done. That is the scary part. To look within with self-honesty is hard. Examine the motivation. Do we forgive to get something back? Do we hope the “enemy” will change? Some people simply do not have the skill or the will to do so. One should consider that it’s the right thing to do. It grants freedom to the angry one and to the “enemy.” The “enemy” is now free to do as they wish. Hate will never overcome compassion; nothing is as strong as Bodhicitta- Love.

One has nothing to fear from the generous act of forgiveness! It is quite healing, and it sure does build character. Like I said, it is hard work. And then one is free from the awful burden of neurotic circular thinking. When one has that issue, one simply cannot let go. It becomes an ugly illness that affects one’s whole life. With rage running the show, then comes obsessive behavior. One literally can think of nothing else. The stress of being that way will destroy one’s health due to hormones and chemistry completely out of control. And then the rest of one’s life is conditioned by that. At that point maybe medical help is needed, or the wisdom of a friend with clarity to talk to, counseling, or perhaps a retreat where one can examine those sick feelings. There are books that may help, and there is help online. Today there are many ways. One excellent method is to meditate and pray for help and contemplate the situation.

Usually an “enemy” is just looking for power and feels powerless. Or they are trying to be happy and simply do not know how to be happy. They are lost and need our compassion, as they cannot help themselves at all.

One may even need to study aberrant behavior to understand the activity of the foe. Any effort needed is so useful, as forgiveness is liberating, and healing. One can walk away a new and far better person – stronger, kinder, happier, and at peace. The freedom to let it go! Get on with your life, rather than your “enemy.” When that is accomplished, the enemy is an enemy no more. And just look at the gift you have given yourself! Liberation from a trap that hurts so much, and eventually kills. You don’t want a hard, selfish heart. It will turn out you will suffer.

I would like to recommend as a start that you follow @RCInstitute on twitter; Ruthless Compassion Institute. Please read Dr. Marcia’s blog for some good advice and help. I admire her. She is a very wise and lovely person. There is so much help; one has no excuse for remaining ill, and helpless. Go for it! It is love, Dharma!

© Jetsunma Ahkön Lhamo